Category Archives: is it lovely?

our lovely harvest

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I tease that you can take the girl out of the Midwest, but you can’t take the Midwest out of the girl. : )

My Midwest fix for the summer has been planting our garden.  Since our backyard is on a slope, it kind of turned into a fortress!  My husband did an amazing job building it, and it has been a lot of fun to grow our produce!

These are some of my favorites…

The mighty zucchini!  It’s like a balloon animal.  Seriously.  It’s fun to see how it grows.  First a hollow stalk comes out, like one of those long skinny balloons that clowns use.  Then the zucchini kind of comes from the base and fills in part of the stalk – just like someone blowing up one of those balloon animals.  And the little flower on the end is like the knot on the end of the balloon. They’re really fun.

I also love the green beans… and all the ones that vine!  Cantaloupe, peas – their little tentacles are so cute!  They have a great time wrapping themselves around on the trellis and other plant stalks.

We’re also trying to grow strawberries - the plants produce stems called runners.  I learned perhaps a little late that we’re actually supposed to clip the runners.  Though they may seem like they’re making the plant more prolific with more stems, they actually end up taking nutrients away from the main plant and decrease strawberry production.  So we got out our scissors and started clipping our runners.  There were quite a few of them – some of them had even developed their own roots!

And as I was clipping the strawberry runners, I started thinking,

“Uh oh.  I’ve got a runner.  In my blog – I have a runner.”

This whole judging section of the blog – there are so many stories to tell and so many verses of Scripture to talk about!  Judging is everywhere.  But it’s turning into a runner.  If I don’t prune it back a little, I’m going to end up with this judging section taking up roots!  So we’ll prune it for now and try to come back to it sometime so we can keep feeding the plant!

What, again, was the plant?

I’m so glad you asked!

We started this blog not quite a year ago, and I am still unpacking ‘worthy of confronting’!  How crazy is that?  I knew the Lord had been showing me some things about whether things were worthy of confronting, but I had no idea it was this much!!  It is crazy important.

In conflict, it’s not just how we confront and respond.  It’s if we should even be confronting about it in the first place.

Or to go back even further than that – should we even be *thinking* it in the first place!

So that’s our main vine for now:  Should I even be thinking this stuff?  Much less getting mad at someone else over it and confronting them on it!  We’ve explored Philippians 4:8’s true, noble, right, pure… and we’re wrapping up lovely.  I added some categories on our menu under ‘worthy of confronting’ to help differentiate all this – I hope you like them!

So what were the main things that stemmed from our discussion of ‘lovely’?  (Did you catch that lovely little plant reference? : ))

{warning!}  a bit of hyperlink craze is ahead… we’ve been on this topic for a while!

‘Lovely’ seems to mean

Why shouldn’t we judge?

Not judging others is truly a blessing – to them and to us!

So what do we do?

What are some principles that help us not judge… but think lovely thoughts?

  • the -++ principle
  • A weakness is often simply a strength taken to an extreme.
  • Beware of the things you love most about someone – those are the things Satan will use to drive you crazy!

Lovely goodness!!  Quite the harvest, eh?

Lots to ponder as we seek to set our minds on things that are true, noble, right, pure, and lovely.  Up next – admirable!

The “How” of How to be Right!

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So we’ve concluded that there is one – and only one – way to be right: to agree with God.

Everything else? Well, the obvious opposite is that if it disagrees with God, it’s wrong. And all the other stuff? Well, that’s personal preference, or a current best suggestion based on current best knowledge and understanding. Which can, of course, change in no time flat.

But I digress! If the way to be right is to agree with God, how do we do that?

Well, for the stuff in Scripture, we simply agree with it! We study it, know it, memorize it, align with it, practice it, implement it, reflect it, live it… and live by the Spirit in doing the best we can with it!

But what about the types of things Job’s friends were saying? How do we know if those are true of us? How do we come to right conclusion? A humbly right one, that is! We of course want to be open to sin in our lives, but we are in dangerous, destructive territory if we open ourselves to others’ inaccurate perceptions of sin in our lives. Because ‘inaccurate perception’ is simply seven syllables for a very destructive one: lie.

So what do we do about judgments? Paul talks about this in Galatians 6. He begins by talking about someone caught in sin.. that we should *restore* him *gently* (I feel another digression coming on!). A few sentences later, he gives this important instruction:

Each one should test his own actions…for each one should carry his own load.

It’s similar to the beloved Psalm 139:23-24:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

What emphasis do we see? It’s all about our relationship with the Lord and the Lord’s examining us. It’s all about personal responsibility. It doesn’t tell us to search another person’s heart – it tells us to search our own. It tells us to carry our own load. It tells us to mind our business! And that doesn’t just mean to stay out of other people’s business (with of course the loving exception of actual, factual sin) but to actively mind our own business. We are not told to search other people’s hearts, but we are told to search our own! Are we applying that in the right proportion?

{step off of soap box : )}

So how do we do this? I mean, really, truly, how? What specifically do we do?

Well, we’re in luck! And *free* luck at that – my favorite kind! : ) ChristianAudio’s free audiobook download this month is all about Hearing God. After all,

“I the LORD search the heart and examine the mind.” ~ Jeremiah 17:10

It is God’s job to search our hearts. We mustn’t give that responsibility – and privilege – to a lesser being.

How to be Right

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How can we be sure we’re right?

I mean – if I perceived something one way, and someone perceives it another – who is right?  Or if I think something should be done one way and someone else thinks it should be done another – who is right?  Like do you wake the sleeping baby to feed him, or do you never wake a sleeping baby?  Or there is always the age old over/under debate!  Who is right?

Well, we’re hanging out with Job, and he was right.  So how can we be like Job?

Now granted, the Lord had some things to say to Job – four chapters worth!  And Job had some repenting to do (Job 42:1-6).  But the Lord affirms that Job was right.  The Lord says to the three friends about Job,

“I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken of me what is right, as my servant Job has.”  ~ Job 42:7

We covered the three friends‘ being really wrong last post.  So let’s focus on Job – he was actually right!  Because why?

Because the Lord says so?  Well yes, that is a fine answer.  God says it so we believe it!  But in a similar three-friend-like situation, how would I know if I am right?  After all, I’m not in the Bible – I don’t have any inerrant Word of God written about me!

Let’s try the same answer from a different angle.  Job isn’t right simply because Job is right – Job didn’t come up with some random things and then God decreed that Job’s thoughts are right and the friends are wrong.  Job is right because the things he said agreed with God.

That’s what makes a person right.

When they agree with God.

Because God is always right.

It’s a bit Lincoln-esque:

“Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to be on God’s side, for God is always right.”

If our thoughts for sure don’t agree with God, then of course we’re for sure not right.  While the extreme is obvious, the middle ground is important to remember: if we’re not sure if our thoughts agree with God, then we may not right.

This applies to so many things!  My perception of another person – if it doesn’t align with what God knows of them and their heart, then I’m not right.  The tone with which I think a person wrote an e-mail – if it doesn’t align with what God knows of them and their heart, then I’m not right.  How I think a person should have responded – if it doesn’t algin with what God knows of them and their heart, then I’m not right.  The decision I think a person should make about a non-sin issue – if it doesn’t align with God’s plan for them, then I’m not right.

So how do I know?

How do I know if my thoughts about another person align with God’s?

How do I know if I’m right?

Just a warning here that you may not like this answer.  I mean, how could we possibly know what God wants for them?  If it’s in Scripture, we totally in love and with care share with them our understanding of what the Lord desires.  But if it’s not in Scripture, how do I know if what I think aligns with God?  How do I know if I’m right?

The answer?  I don’t.

I don’t know if I’m right.

And to pretend like I do?  Well, to Job’s friends, the Lord called that ‘folly.’

My heart?  My motives?  My tone?  My decision about a non-sin issue?  I’m not that old!  They aren’t in Scripture!

So unless it’s in Scripture, we best not act like we’re right.

(More specifics on How to be Right next post!)

A Beautiful Restoration

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We’re hanging out with Job, and we mentioned last post,

“Job actually was right.  And they are wrong.”

I want to delve into that a little more deeply…

Job’s friends were not just wrong – they were really, really wrong!!  The Lord called their perceptions of Job and his relationship with the Lord ‘folly’ and expressed that he was ‘angry’ with them.  So he asks them to make a sacrifice,

“So now take seven bulls and seven rams and go to my servant Job and sacrifice a burnt offering for yourselves. My servant Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer and not deal with you according to your folly.”  ~ Job 42:8

There are two things that I just love about how God commands this restoration.  The first is about the dynamics of the offering…

God asks the friends to sacrifice a burnt offering:

“A burnt offering was the complete destruction of the animal (except for the hide) in an effort to renew the relationship between the Holy God and sinful man.”

Note it is *the friends* who need to renew their relationship with the Lord.  They thought Job was in the wrong for dozens of chapters… but really, it was their perception of Job and the Lord that was wrong.  So much so that they need to offer a sacrifice and renew their relationship with God.

“[A burnt offering] was a sacrifice of general atonement—an acknowledgement of the sin nature and a request for renewed relationship with God.”

It is interesting that a burnt offering is described in Leviticus 1 as a single animal — ‘a’ male or ‘the’ bull.  At the important celebration of Passover, the burnt offering is two bulls, one ram, and seven lambs (Numbers 28:19).  Now we can’t pretend to know God’s thinking behind the number of animals, but I do find it intriguing that Job’s friends were told to sacrifice more than that.  Not just ‘a’ burnt offering.  And more than what is sacrificed at Passover.  They were told to sacrifice 14 animals in total!

I also find it interesting that they were told to go ‘to my servant Job’ to sacrifice the animals.  The Lord doesn’t say just to sacrifice them.  He doesn’t offer another person to serve as the priest.  Instead, he tells them to go to Job to sacrifice the animals!  After Job’s repentance, it seems that the Lord may be either affirming Job as a high priest-type role (cf Job 1:5), or He is emphasizing the importance of the friends’ repentance both to Job and to the Lord, or both.  The Lord affirms Job and seeks to restore all the relationships – between friends and with their God.

So that’s the first thing I love: the picture of the friends’ sacrifice to the Lord being offered to Job.  It seems to offer such a beautiful illustration of forgiving the friends just as God forgives them!  It conveys such a tight depiction of the relational dynamics: restoring the Job-friends relationship just as God will restore the God-friends relationship.

Here’s the second thing I love…

Job also has an important role in all of this:

“My servant Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer and not deal with you according to your folly.”  ~ Job 42:8

Humility of all humility, God chooses not to treat the friends ‘according to their folly’ because Job will pray for them.  The one they’ve been critiquing, the one to whom they’ve been saying false things about him and his perception of God – he will intervene for them – he will be obedient to the Lord – so that the Lord will not deal with his false accusers according to their folly.

This is likely valuable for Job as well.  I love that the Lord seems to account for what He instructs millennia later:

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.  ~ Ephesians 4:31-32

I just love this!  Job has a role in the friends’ repentance: praying for them.  If it were me, this role would help me be sure to rid of any bitterness that is there, may be unbeknownst there, or that may creep in.  It would help me act with compassion towards my friends and be sure I have forgiven them.

I just love the restoration dynamics that the Lord puts together.  What a beautiful illustration of forgiving friends just as God forgives them!

If you’re in a similar Job-friends struggle in your life, may I encourage you that you are not alone.  In fact, you are in company throughout the ages. Job was a contemporary of Abraham - the book of Job takes place chronologically in Genesis!  We’ve got the creation of the world, Adam and Eve, Noah and the flood, Tower of Babel, then Abraham and Job.  So early human history is filled with chapters of friends falsely characterizing a godly person and his motives.  This is not new territory.

So maybe it should be all the more poignant for us.  We see from early in history what Satan does and the destruction he causes.  We see from early on whose team we can choose to help as a person’s friends.  That choice is an age-old question.  As is its answer!

A special thanks to lightharmony.com for today’s fantastic picture!

Hanging out with Job

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I’ve been hanging out in Job lately.  Poor man, right?  I mean, his whole world gets taken from him, and as if that’s not enough, then his friends all start falsely judging him and his relationship with the Lord.  Misperceiving his heart.  Telling him things about his motives that aren’t true.  And telling him things about his life and God’s motives in his life that are patently false.

Ughhh…. to have Job’s friends.  Especially at a time when he so needed them.

Have you ever been there?

When those you long to support you all instead judge you?

If so, I am sorry.  It’s painful.  And it’s lonely. And I am sorry for your suffering.

As if that weren’t hard enough, what can make it even more difficult is when – like Job’s friends – they are united in their judgment. When they have camaraderie in their perceptions.  It can create a feeling of legitimacy and validity.  It can strengthen their resolve in the ‘correctness’ of the judgments.

And it leaves Job – or you – out to dry.

We’ve talked about the danger of this mindset:

If one person calls you a horse, buck it off.
If three people call you a horse, buy a saddle.

Yes, it’s a cute phrase… but does it pass through the grid of Scripture?  That’s what matters!  Our blog on it covers some helpful territory, yet as I’ve been hanging out in Job, the Lord has, for me, brought the clearest example of the danger of that mindset.

Job was, after all, called all kinds of things by – how many? – three people.  (And in the end, ultimately four.) They have chapters and chapters and chapters of perceptions, judgments, and arguments about him and his relationship with the Lord. So are they right?  Is Job a ‘horse’?

This is what the Lord God says:

“There is no one on earth like [Job]; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.”  ~ Job 1:8

The Lord God says Job is blameless and upright.  The Lord God says Job fears God and shuns evil.

So the (so called?) friends’ seeming unity of thought does not strengthen their argument.  Instead, it actually weakens them.  Or perhaps it’s more poignant than that: It deceives them.

And in their deceived mindset, what do they do?  Share them with Job and add to his distress.  In other words, they in effect help add to his calamity.

Yikes.

That was Satan’s job.

What does God think of the three friends?  The Lord says,

“I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken of me what is right, as my servant Job has.”  ~ Job 42:7

The Lord God is angry with them.  Oh yikes.  My eyes well up with tears as I read that.  Those are words I sure don’t want to hear from my Lord!

Job actually was right.  And they are wrong.  The Lord God calls their characterizations “folly.”  And He repeats his assessment in the next verse:

“You have not spoken of me what is right, as my servant Job has.”  ~ Job 42:8

My heart sinks.

What should Job’s friends have done?  Instead of presenting their characterizations, what are we to do with arguments and perceptions that set themselves up against the knowledge of God?

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God.  ~ 2 Corinthians 10:5

We demolish them.  Dethrone them.  Put an end to them. Remember the cross imagery? We remove them. In a powerful, intentional, offensive, vanquishing way, we destroy them.

Such a powerful reminder from Job and his (so called?) friends.

Lord, help us not to be people of “folly.” Help us to demolish every argument and perception that sets itself up against your knowledge.  Help us to be friends of care, not judgment.  And help us to speak of you and your people what is right and pure.

But ‘their heart is deceitful’!

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We’ve looked at a lot of reasons why *not* to judge.  One of the biggest arguments I hear to defend judging is this:

“But your heart is deceitful.”

The situation would go something like this:

Jimmy approaches Sally and tells her something that he thinks he sees in her – something that negatively defines her character or motives.  Sally is stunned and tries to clarify that he has misperceived the situation and her motives.  Jimmy responds, “Well, Sally, your motives aren’t always as pure as you think.  After all, your heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.”

Hmmmm… is Jimmy spot on?

Jimmy sounds godly by quoting Scripture.  And at first glance, maybe the situation seems like Jimmy should be able to speak about Sally’s heart.

But let’s look a little more deeply.

If it’s true that our heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure (and Scripture says it, so I believe it), then what makes Jimmy’s heart any different from Sally’s?  If that verse applies to Sally’s heart, then why wouldn’t it apply to Jimmy’s as well?  So we’ve got Jimmy’s deceitful heart characterizing Sally’s deceitful heart.   That doesn’t clarify the motives of the heart – it compounds the deceit of the heart! 

Now in some situations, the “Jimmy” of the situation will then say, “But Sally is wrong.  I see this clearly, and she doesn’t.”  Again, if the heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure, then how are we to trust that Jimmy’s ‘seeing Sally’s heart clearly’ isn’t deceitful and beyond cure?  Being firmly convinced certainly doesn’t preclude deceit!

So we’ve got the logic argument that compounding deceit makes judgment worse – not better!

Let’s also look at the contextual argument.  Here’s our verse with the verses before it:

5 This is what the Lord says:

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
who draws strength from mere flesh
and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
6 That person will be like a bush in the wastelands;
they will not see prosperity when it comes.
They will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
in a salt land where no one lives.

7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
whose confidence is in him.
8 They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.”

9 The heart is deceitful above all things
 and beyond cure.   Who can understand it?  ~ Jeremiah 17:5-9

The Lord God says not to trust in man.  After all, what man can understand the heart?  Instead, trust in God.

Then check this out – this is the very next verse!

“I the Lord search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward each person according to their conduct,
according to what their deeds deserve.”  ~ Jeremiah 17:10

The argument that Sally’s heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure does *not* merit Jimmy’s judging it.  The point of the verse is *not* to have another person’s deceitful heart judge yours.  It is *not* to rely on man.

Instead, it is that the Lord searches our hearts.  It is to trust in the Lord!

Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.  ~ Psalm 139:23-24

Our heart is deceitful, so GOD is the one who searches the heart!  His is not deceitful.  It is only from a pure perspective – and He’s the only one with a pure perspective! – that our hearts can be accurately perceived.

Question: What are some other reasons why we shouldn’t defend judging another person with ‘but your heart is deceitful’?

Palliate!

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So I learned a new word today: palliating.

I was reading a commentary on Matthew 7:1’s “Judge not lest ye be judged.”  Barnes’ Notes on the Bible explains judging as, among other things, “the habit of forming a judgment …without an allowance for every palliating circumstance.”

So maybe you’re more of a lexicomane than I.  {Do you like that?  It’s another kind of fun word I learned today : ) – apparently it’s up and coming.}  Anyways, I wasn’t really sure what palliating meant… so I wasn’t really sure if I was in the habit of doing it or not.

Good ol’ Webster tells me that palliating basically means extenuating or mitigating; it can lessen the severity of something (often a disease).  So Barnes’ challenge is not to form judgments without allowing for every extenuating circumstance.

Re-framed positively, his encouragement is to first consider every possible circumstance before judging.

So if I am frustrated with someone, I should consider

  • What may have contributed to their action?
  • What else is going on in their life?
  • How might they have perceived this?
  • Whom do I know them to be?
  • How would their God-given gifts affect their handling of the situation?
  • How would their God-given personality affect their handling of the situation?
  • How would their spiritual maturity affect their response to the situation?
  • What other stressors in their life should I be considering?
  • What other situations in their life may frame their actions?
  • What may have been their godly intent?
  • Does the timing of the situation play into this at all?
  • Does the location of the situation affect it at all?
  • Do the others involved affect it at all?
  • What might their emotions or feelings have been at the time?

It’s also helpful to consider me in the equation:

  • How does my background affect how I perceive their actions?
  • How does my personality affect how I perceive them?
  • What else might be going on in my life that may affect my relationship with them?
  • What might I not fully understand about this situation?

And perhaps most importantly,

  • Lord, what else am I missing?

Just some brainstorms!  This certainly isn’t intended to be an exhaustive list or a checklist, but these types of questions can help us think through a situation and consider it from all angles.  Considering all possible mitigating circumstances can help keep us from judging unfairly… from judging in an ungodly manner.

So let’s go forth and palliate!

Or maybe this is a better palliating campaign slogan:  Be a pal and palliate!

[ Sorry to those of you whose cheese-meters just exploded : )]

Question:  What questions and considerations help you palliate?

Team Name – a great marriage tip!

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Have a team name.

That’s it.

One of the best pieces of advice we got when we got married:  Have a team name.

It simply helps us remember an important key - we are on the same team.  We’re teammates, not opponents.  And when things start to feel like we’re opponents… well, it’s totally what we talked about last time: the Enemy just loves that.  If he can get us to take each other down – oh how easy his job becomes!  If he can get us to be destructive towards each other … nit-pick at each other … say critical, inaccurate things about each others motives … have a negative, hurtful perception of the other… if he can get us to help him with his job, he is a happy camper.  If he can get us to act more like we’re on his team than our spouse’s – yikes.

But the truth is this:

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.  ~ Ephesians 6:12

Our enemy is not our spouse.  Our enemy is sin and Satan.

And the truth is this:

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.  ~ Ecclesiastes 4:12

There is such strength in a united husband, wife, and the Lord!  Those three strands united as a team have such alliance, solidarity, and strength!

So we commit to

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.  ~ 1 Peter 5:8

As we stay alert – committed to our unity as a team and focused on trying to figure out how as a team we can move forward, we move through situations with unity and strength.  With courage and fortitude, we defeat inklings of accusation or blame, and we keep the devil from a foothold!

Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. ~ Mark 10:9

Amen!!  In the strength and solidity of the Lord, commitment to a team mindset enables wonderful victory!

Thanks to Kate McElwee for the very fun bride and groom shot!  www.katemcelweephotography.com

Whose team are you playing for?

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The answer may not be as obvious as you think!

In my seven years of seminary, there is one moment I remember so clearly.  It was one of the most poignant gems.

I mean, it was a gem in the sense that it was a treasure – a phenomenally helpful paradigm for my relationship with others, our thoughts about one another, and our reflection of the Lord.

But I must say, my initial reaction was a bit incredulous.

At first, it seemed so strong that my natural, sort of knee-jerk reaction was to want to think it wasn’t true.  To try to think of a way it couldn’t be true.  Or perhaps, it was to *desire* that it wasn’t true.

But I kind of think it is.

I was sitting in a counseling class.  In a very average spot – middle desk in the middle row.  The professor was talking and teaching, and we were discussing and note taking. It seemed like a normal class on a normal day. And then, in the midst of the ordinary, he asked an intriguing question,

Do you know why it is such a heinous sin to falsely accuse your brother or sister in Christ?

Wow.  That really got my attention.  If I’d been daydreaming, I certainly wasn’t anymore.

Heinous sin?  Wow.

Now granted, any good philosophy student or any good logic student would have a heyday with that question.  Yes, it is a loaded question.   It carries very loaded assumptions.

The question first assumes that people falsely accuse fellow believers.  Maybe it’s not as egregious as a total, out-of-the-blue, radical sin – I don’t know many of us who walk around falsely accusing people of murder.  Maybe the false accusations are more subtle: “You were selfish when you did this.” “You acted entitled when you did that.” “You expect us to serve you.”  “You were arrogant when you made that comment.”  I mean, those things might be true.  But they might also be false.  There are many reasons why a person may have done what they did or said what they said.  And to presume to know the motive of a man’s heart – Yikes.  That’s way above all our pay grades!

So maybe such ‘false accusations’ are simply just mistakes.  Maybe they’re really just mistaken accusations.  Or misperceptions, perhaps.  Should we really be calling them heinous sins?  I was intrigued to see how my professor was going to answer it.

We all sat there sort of like deer in headlights processing this hugely loaded question.  Would the response justify its wording?

And this was his answer:

Because that’s what Satan does.

Um, yikes.

That had to sink in a bit.

The devil is the false accuser of the brethren.

Wow.

I mean, that’s true.  I can’t argue with that.  That’s how he’s described in Revelation 12:10.  In fact, that is what his name means: devil means ‘false accuser.’  He attacks people’s character as he did in Job 1-2.

But the implication?  Wow.

So the devil is the false accuser of the brethren.  That’s true.  He attacks character.  And as the rest of the chapters in Job illustrate, others can quickly follow suit.

When they do… when they join in being a false accuser of fellow believers… um, whose team does that most resemble?

  • Christ’s – our advocate before the Father
  • Or Satan – the accuser of the brethren

It’s a bit stunning.

I must say that I think my professor’s question is merited.  It seems indeed to be a sin if we’re rallying on the wrong team.  But ‘heinous’?  Oh yikes.  Yet I think even this word is merited.  Playing for the wrong team is indeed dangerous – and has potentially been called worse.  Traitors – whether intentionally or unintentionally – give a path for the enemy to advance.

Such a stunning question with such convicting implications.

And such revealing implications as well. Committing to a singular conviction of challenging people according to God and His Word – not speculated motives – is a huge threat to the devil.  He likes it when he can trick us into taking jabs at other believers.  He loves the help.

So whose team will you play on?  You may get a little pushback from the weakening devil.  But squashing heinous sin is worth it - Amen?

1 Key to a Valuable (not destructive!) Confrontation

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I share the following with great – well, ‘trepidation’ is too strong a word.  Maybe with great respect for the Enemy… but with confidence in the Lord, His Word, and His application of Scripture in our lives.

Last year, our small group read a great book – David Platt’s Radical.

We were in the midst of his chapter on community – all about how we all join together to fulfill God’s purpose.  I just love the vision and truth he brings to light.  As Jesus is preparing to go to the cross, he recounts to the Father his ministry to the world: “I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do” (John 17:4).

Platt notes the intriguing things that Jesus does not include in his summary of his works on earth:

What is shocking is that when Jesus summarizes his work on earth, he doesn’t start by reliving all the great sermons he preached and all the people who came to listen to him.  He doesn’t talk about the amazing miracles he performed—giving sight to the blind, enabling the lame to walk, and feeding thousands of people with minimal food.  He doesn’t even mention bringing the dead back to life.

Instead, this is what Jesus includes in his summary of the work God gave him to do:

Instead he talks repeatedly about the small group of men God had given him out of the world.  They were the work God had given him.  They were, quite literally, his life.

I love that.  Platt emphasizes that the way you change the world is by investing in a few.

With the task of taking the gospel to the world, [Jesus] wandered through the streets and byways of Israel looking for a few men… He was initiating a revolution, but his revolution would not revolve around the masses or multitudes…. All he wanted was a few men who would think as he did, love as he did, see as he did, teach as he did, and serve as he did.  All he needed was to revolutionize the hearts of a few, and they would impact the world.

It’s a fascinating ‘mega-growth’ strategy – the power of a small group.

So we started talking about our small group and the power of community.  The power of being a band of disciples.  The power of investing in one another’s lives. The power of challenging one another.

Then I asked a question that I think ruffled the devil a bit.

As we were talking about challenging one another, I wanted to explore what is was that made for an effective challenge of another.  Sometimes challenges feel helpful, growth-oriented, and inspiring towards the Lord.  Other times, they feel demeaning, destructive, and persnicketily critical. What is it that makes a challenge one or the other?

So we looked at the passage David Platt discusses in this chapter – John 17.  I just love this passage! Jesus prays to be glorified, then he prays the most incredible, passionate prayer for his disciples and then for all believers.  It is such a beautiful and exciting – if not a bit challenging – vision of what he desires for us to be as His body of disciples.

The verses Radical was specifically talking about were 6-19, Jesus’ prayer for his disciples, so we camped there for our answer.  What is it that makes this investing in one another’s lives and challenging one another valuable and not destructive?

Listen to Christ’s intense connection to and commitment to God and His Word:

I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me.

Yum – there is so much wonderfulness in this passage!  We’ll just briefly recap a couple things about Christ:

  • “I have revealed you”

Christ – part of the Godhead! – was focused not on teaching the disciples things he thought were valuable and important.  As part of the Godhead, He certainly could teach his thoughts, opinions, and preferences on how the disciples interact and relate. Instead, he was focused on revealing the Father.  The things he focused on with the disciples pertained to revealing God.

  •  “I gave them the words you gave me.”

Christ’s focus was on passing along God’s word.  Jesus knew that everything given to him comes from God.  Even Christ – part of the Godhead! – didn’t throw in his opinion regarding what to challenge people on and teach people.  Instead, he focused on the things that came from God – the words God gave.  And glory!  The disciples accepted them.

That leads us to a couple things about the disciples:

  • “They have obeyed your word”

Christ’s first description of his disciples’ actions was that they obeyed God’s word.  He knew that’s what the Father cares about – that they align their hearts and lives to God’s desire.  And they did!  He didn’t describe his disciples as having been accomplished, obeying the right social customs, or doing what people thought they should do.  His focus is on their obeying God’s word!

  • “They accepted them”

The disciples accepted Christ’s words – that is, Christ’s words that were God’s words.  They knew with certainty that Christ came from God – and that his words were from God.  And they accepted them!

So I’m guessing you’ve picked up on the theme here: Christ’s focus was on revealing God and giving the words God gave, and the disciples obeyed and accepted because they knew the source was God.

So what’s the answer to our question?

Q:  What is it that makes challenging one another valuable and not destructive?

A:  When our focus is on revealing God and His Word.  A challenge is valuable when we know the source is God.

Jesus was so tightly committed to this.  His prayer mentions this concept over and over from several angles.  And Jesus was part of the Godhead!  If He emphasizes how important it was for him to focus on revealing God and His Word, how much should we?

Now can I say that this focus, commitment, and passion scares the silliness out of the devil.  Or maybe it is more accurate to say it scares the silliness into the devil.  He does not like when a group of believers becomes committed to this.  I have experienced it firsthand… and can so understand Jesus’ passion that his ensuing prayer is for protection:

Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name, the name you gave me, so that they may be one as we are one… protect them from the evil one.

A singleness of purpose so committed to revealing God and His Word – and nothing else – is a huge threat to the devil.  We’ll talk about why more in our next post.

Knowing that reveals its power.  Knowing that this gets the devil up in arms – knowing that committing to this means we need to pray for protection from the evil one – highlights that this is crazy, powerful stuff.  This is the heart of the kingdom.  This is the marrow of the gospel.  God’s word, God’s thoughts, God’s opinion – and nothing else.

I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them.

Oh what joy it brings!

Question: What is a way that you can be sure the challenges you make to others are from God and His Word? This is a great way to increase joy – in your life as well as in the lives of others!  Feel free to leave your thoughts below.

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